Moving on with my life I have found myself in a weird spot. Michael and everything that went down with him is still fresh in my head, James is still texting me, and I’m making new guy friends thanks to Gabbi. When I think about James I’m not sure what I want from that situation. At first he was someone that I thought could take my virginity, but after everything I’m not feeling it anymore. Now after hanging out with Gabbi and her roommates a few of them like me. First it was Michael, but he didn’t act on it. Next there was Jesse, the other night tried to make a move on me, but me being my awkward self blew that. After Gabbi went to sleep it was just us in the living room, I was on one chair and he was on the couch and asked for me to come set closer, but my first reaction was “no, I’m fine here.” it was until after when he got awkward that I realized what he wanted. Then Gabbi at the Super Bowl Party asked about the situation and confirmed that Jesse liked me. While we were at the Super Bowl Party her other roommate Joe was being extra chatty and asked for my number from Gabbi after I left.
While I’m super flattered by all of this attention I just don’t know what I want right now and don’t want anymore to get the wrong impression. I’m still confused and hurt from the Katie, Ali, and Marissa thing. Michael is still in the back of my head. I just don’t want to ruin any of these new friendships. I wish I had Ali to talk to about all this. She would know what to do. I miss her.